Let me preface this by saying there is an 83% chance that this review transforms into a rant. Does anyone actually like The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift? No? So we’re on the same page, then. I must say, it is extremely different rewatching this installment of the franchise when you are completely up-to-date.
FIRST OF ALL, the most boring opening sequence to a movie. HOW ON EARTH IS THIS SUPPOSED TO INTRIGUE US FOR THE REST OF THE FILM? I do appreciate the song choice, though (Six Days by DJ Shadow). I do understand the point of the opening sequence, it’s supposed to show a cliche and monotonous high school existence. All the better to show the drastic differences in Tokyo later. Literally the worst part of this movie happens in the first two minutes: A KID IS GETTING BULLIED BY OTHER STUDENTS AND SEAN DOES NOTHING TO HELP HIM. WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE, SEAN? Then the first race is in the “Shangri-La Estates”. Who do they think they’re fooling? Is that supposed to be some form of foreshadowing? There was no punch to that first race. It didn’t have even 1/5 of the intensity that the first two Fast and Furious movies had. Maybe because we go into it knowing that they are stupid teenagers, but I digress.
His relationship with his father is EXTREMELY uncomfortable to watch. There is no connection/bond there. Also, what a horrible thing for his father to just let him sink or swim in getting to his high school on his first day by himself. Rude. And the shoe thing is definitely something that would’ve happened to me too, but I would’ve turned beet red and possibly cried. I AM AN EMOTIONAL PERSON, OKAY?
And now, for one of the two bright spots in this entire film: TWINKIE AKA BOW WOW. That car, though. I’m never fully sure how to process the sight of it. I do love my Marvel characters, but that is a bit much. Again though, I appreciate this music choice (My Life Be Like by Grits). My real question is, how did Twinkie get introduced to the race scene in Tokyo? What was his connection? And how does he get his hands on all of that merchandise he’s pushing?
Hello to the other semi-important characters, including “the Justin Timberlake of Japan”. BUT PRAISE THE LORD FOR HAN, THOUGH. LITERALLY THE BEST CHARACTER IN THIS MOVIE AND THE ONLY THING THAT SAVES IT. Even the drifting isn’t impressive enough to redeem this story. It’s literally Han. His chill personality and blase`attitude are the best. The only one with enough patience to try and make Sean a real driver. I am genuinely embarrassed for Sean in his first Tokyo race. Did he really have to let his pride and hot-head get him into trouble on his FIRST DAY in a new country? Like, you have NO clue about the lifestyle and culture of this country, so lay low for a bit. It’s really common sense. But I love how Han gives Sean no choice but to follow his command and learn from him. What does he see in Sean? For those of you who have seen the entire franchise already, then you know the answer to this question. As do I. I also know the answer to how Han can afford all of his toys. THE REST OF YOU NEED TO GET ON MY LEVEL.
Twinkie’s breakdown of the social/model scene in Tokyo is hilarious. And honestly, probably true. If I were a gorgeous model with guys either always trying to impress me or too scared to talk to me, I would totally go for the funny guy.
“Who you choose to be around you let’s you know who you are.” – THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT QUOTE OF THE ENTIRE MOVIE AND OF COURSE IT IS SAID BY HAN. “Life is simple: you make choices and you don’t look back.” Part of me wishes that we got to see Sean’s drift training in real time because I am very curious just how long it takes someone to learn it.
The rest of this movie though, at least until the VERY end, I cannot really handle. HOW DARE THEY? HOW. DARE. THEY. You know what I’m talking about. But the ending is perfect.